Top ten things you won’t hear at commencement

May 28th, 2018 | Posted by jameswatkins in Uncategorized


Ever since Pebbles and Bam Bam graduated from Bedrock High, commencement speakers have been telling the crowd of cap and gowns to work for world peace, follow its dreams, and always wear clean underwear in case of an accident.

So cue Pomp and Happenstance, here are the top ten things I’ve learned since I wore a black bathrobe and silly hat.

1. World peace is not gonna to happen. Sorry commencement speakers, presidential candidates, and Miss America contestants. Two thousand years ago Jesus said there would be wars and rumors of wars, and he hasn’t been wrong yet. Better to work at being at peace with yourself. Now if just six billion people would all do that . . . [Continue reading]

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