Telemarathon: Callers attempt to contact their party in record time despite the electronic obstacle course: "If you know your party's extension, press 1." "For a menu of options, press 2." "Press the last four letters of your party's last name. Use # for Q and * for Z." "Press 0 for an operator." "All operators are busy keeping other customers on hold." [Muzak] "Your call may be recorded to assure quality service." Click! Bzzzzzzzzzzzz.

Xeroxathon: Contestants must un-jam the copier, load a ream of paper, and change toner (Current record 38.6 seconds)

SPAMathon: Olympic employees must respond to 100 emails (half of which are e-junkmail) before the server goes down.

Decipherthon: Administrative assistants attempt to read their supervisor's handwriting.

Balance Beam: Attempt to balance work and family responsibilities. Extra "degree of difficulty" points if job requires travel or child has Attention Deficiency Disorder.

Relay race: See how fast Person A can get work off his/her desk and on to Person B's desk.

Weight Lifting: If you work on the loading dock or mailroom of your office or factory, you're already in Olympic shape--or on medical leave.

Vault: Contestants must race to the bank after work before it closes.

1,000-Word Dash: Competitors attempt to write a humor column under the current world record time of 4 minutes 42 seconds. (Extra points for technical and artistic merit if column actually makes sense.)

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