If you’re going to insult someone, at least be Christ-like about it! So, I have in my right hand, direct from my home office in Corn Borer, Indiana, The Top Ten Christian Insults:
10. Ye blind guides, which strain at a gnat, and swallow a camel (Matthew 23:24).
9. O faithless and perverse generation . . . how long shall I suffer you? (Matthew 17:17)
8. Do ye not therefore err, because ye know not the scriptures, neither the power of God? (Mark 12:24)
7. Woe unto you . . . hypocrites! (Luke 11:44)
6. Ye are like unto whited sepulchers, which indeed appear beautiful outward, but are within full of dead men’s bones and of all uncleanness (Matthew 23:27).
5. Ye serpents, ye generation of vipers! (Matthew 23:33)
4. Thou fool! (Luke 12:20)
3. I will spue thee out of my mouth (Revelation 3:16).
2. Get thee behind me, Satan! (Matthew 16:23).
1. O ye of little faith (Matthew 6:30, Matthew 8:26, Matthew 14:31, Matthew 16:8, Matthew 17:20).
Of course, I wouldn’t recommend any of these unless you’re the perfect Son of God! Jesus could see the hearts of men and women, so when he called someone a “whited sepulcher,” you could be sure they were full of “dead men’s bones and all uncleaness.”
So it’s best to leave any judgment to Jesus: “Do not judge, or you too will be judged. For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you (Matthew 7:1-2 NIV).
Now, if you’ll excuse me, I really need to brush my teeth. I have a bad case of camel breath.
Copyright © 2014 James N. Watkins