James Watkins Author Speaker Threat to society

X-treme Sunday school

"Irreverent" from Rev. magazine
September/October 2008

Sunday school hasn't changed much since Robert Raikes (1735-1811) started a school on Sunday to educate the children of chimney sweeps in Sooty Alley in Gloucester, England. While American Sunday school has moved to video projectors from "flannel graphs" (see Wikipedia if under 40 years of age), there has been little change in the actual curriculum—until now!

Here's my proposal for "X-treme Sunday School."

Great Commission Auto: IV
Rather than stealing cars and beating up hookers and the homeless, students in this video-game-based curriculum learn how to evangelize street people and assist stranded motorists in Jesus' name. Bonus points for turning a "chop shop" into a chapel.

Porn Sunday school
Inspired by xxxchurch.com's "Porn Sunday" (I'm not making that up!), "Porn Sunday School" is an in depth study of x-rated Bible stories. Curriculum includes the story of Adam and Eve (pre-fall—and pre-clothes), Noah and his daughters, David and Bethsheba, plus Amnon and Tamar, as well as a verse-by-verse exposition of the Song of Solomon. Included are beautifully illustrated resource posters.

The Beatles and the Bible
"Fab Four" lyrics are examined for spiritual references. Features CD including "Eleanor Rigby," "Hey Jude," "Let It Be" and "My Sweet Lord." The writer claims the opening lyrics to "I Am the Walrus" ("I am he as you are he as you are me and we are all together") are actually a paraphrase of John 14:20 ("On that day you will realize that I am in my Father, and you are in me, and I am in you.")

Scrapbooking the Bible
Capitalizing on America's favorite hobby, students cut out favorite verses and create artistic interpretations in scrapbooks. However, care should be taken that students don't take scriptures out of context, such of Ecclesiastes 10:19: "A feast is made for laughter, and wine makes life merry, but money is the answer for everything."

Religion of the Jedi: VI
Is ObiWan a literary symbol of God the Father? Is Luke the Son? Is "The Force" the Holy Spirit? Is the fate of Jedis predestined or do they have freewill? The curriculum explores these important questions along with debate as to whether episodes I through III are part of the original canon or spurious manuscripts. (Also available, Star Tract, in which students are instructed to boldly evangelize where no man has gone before.)

Prosperity Gospel: The Board Game
Student's learn the principles of seed faith giving as they move around the board. Players hope to "Pass Go; Collect $200 from Teary-Eyed Appeal" and purchase million-dollar homes and corporate jets as well as sign six-figure book deals. Spaces to avoid include "Go Directly to Jail for Income Tax Fraud" and "Sixty-Minutes Investigation."

Wii Wisdom
This children's curriculum is perfect for the church with little space for physical activities. Using Wii controls, children can flee the Egyptians, march around Jericho and stone giants. Includes sing-a-longs such as "Zacchaeus Was a Wii Little Man."

The Good Book and FaceBook Everyone sleeps in until 10 am, then meets at the X-treme Sunday School FaceBook.com page. There, students text comments on praises and prayer requests posted on the site. e. Then, class goes to the weekly Extreme Sunday School YouTube.com lesson, after which responses are posted to the Extreme Sunday School bulletin board. Curriculum includes contemporary worship chorus downloads for "Rockstar."

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X-treme Sunday school

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