Cross-dressing, sex-offending, criminally insane, drug-abusing, ex-con candidate

Wow! I can’t believe it. A candidate for president has just been accused of:

      • cross-dressing while in high school

      • spending numerous nights over a six-year period in a girl’s dorm

      • being confined to the “closed” section of a mental hospital

      • spending time in and out of prison from 1989 to 2005

      • sleeping with the senior pastor while serving as an associate minister at her church

      • using illegal drugs while on an overseas missions trip

      • being investigated by both county and state police agencies.

      • hosting an “adult site” on the Internet.

      • and proclaiming “God hates fags”!

Unbelievable. Stick a fork in it, his campaign is done! Hey, wait . . . that’s me! Yep, I’m running for president with the Tupperware Party: “Putting a lid on government.” And, yes, I did all those things.

Here’s the whole truth:

• Three of my friends and I dressed up to lip-sync as an all-girl rock band for a youth group talent show. (We called ourselves “Cast Iron Pew” because we were a pain in the know-know-where.)

• My wife served six years as resident director at Indiana Wesleyan University.

• While visiting a student in “closed” section of a mental hospital, the shift changed and the new matron had to verify that I wasn’t a patient before I was allowed to leave. (Can you believe that?!)

• I also visited parishioners in both juvenile and adult prisons.

• My wife was senior pastor at a small church while I served as her associate pastor.

• While in India, I came down with severe bronchitis and our host went to the local drug store for cough medicine with codeine, which would be illegal without a prescription in this country. (I did feel so much better!)

• Because I have served in various capacities at churches and colleges, I’ve been subjected to numerous background checks. (I passed them all!)

• Yes, I once had a domain name,, for my articles on sexuality.

• And the complete title of a post was God hates Sheesh!

Here’s my point: Each election cycle, the negative attacks by candidates have been absolutely vicious. Online smears have been even worse! And much of it has been stretching, twisting and perverting the truth! (Don’t get me started on conspiracy theories!)

Even a positive message can be deceptive. For instance, I have a doctoral degree in communications. The whole truth: it was given to me as a Christmas gag gift from a friend who bought it at a diploma mill.

So here’s my second point: Verify, verify, verify!.

Don’t let the candidates, mainstream media or online news sites get away with distorting the truth! The media is biased. (The Drudge Report heralded “Hillary Haters.” However, the article directed to showed that people dislike Donald Trump more than Hillary Clinton.) Candidates are telling only half the truth. (Liar! Liar! Pantsuit on fire!) And the “proof” of conspiracy theories is that they can’t be proven!

Most of all, don’t believe everything you read about me! (Or anyone else.)

Copyright © 2008, 2016 James N. Watkins

It is true, however, I was once a professional unicycle dare devil. Really! (1977-1979)

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