Pour a cup of hot chocolate, turn on the tree, put on Manheim Steamroller and enjoy some sweet and some nutty Christmas poetry and prose.
Christmas at Macy’s
Christ walked into Macy’s on Christmas Eve.
His eyes blinked in amazement
as he wandered though the silver evergreens,
while red, yellow, and blue stars blinked above his head.
Surely, this was not the way he had remembered it
at that glorious time of Creation.
Relief filled his heart as he glimpsed familiar shepherds.
But they were lifeless, hard and hollow;
not anything like he had made.
They bowed before the silent angels
revolving on steel wires above their heads.
It was all so cold and heartless.
Plastic shells of humanity.
I came to give life, to give it abundantly, he pondered
as electronic ornaments beeped “Joy to the World.”
“Don’t you want life?” he called out to the villagers.
But they just smiled with their hand-painted expressions
as they hurriedly shopped for more plastic and vinyl
and stared past Life lying in the manger.
Christmas at Kmart*
ATTENTION SHOPPERS. Now for the next three minutes, at the flashing blue light, we have on sale this beautiful hand-crafted teak wood nativity set. Each figure is elegantly clothed in beautiful satin and . . .
. . . she brought forth her firstborn son, and wrapped him in swaddling clothes, and laid him in a manger, because there was no room for them in the inn.
While you’re there, be sure to see our three-foot weather-proof hand-painted plastic nativity figures. They’ll look perfect on your front lawn. Plus they come complete with 100-watt bulbs and . . .
. . . there were in the same country, shepherds abiding in the field, keeping watch over their flock by night. And, lo, the angel of the Lord came upon them, and the glory of the Lord shone round about them: and they were sore afraid.
In our hardware department burglar alarms and security lights are on sale this week only. And in our sporting department, check out the low prices on our rifles, shotguns, and . . .
. . . and the angel said to the, Fear not; for behold, I bring you good tidings of great joy, which shall be to all people. For unto us is born this day in the city of David a Savior, which is Christ the Lord.
. . . And don’t forget to stop by our Entertainment Center for the latest Christmas hits including “Rudolph the Redneck Reindeer,” “Rappin? Around the Christmas Tree,” and . . .
. . . suddenly there was with the angel a multitude of the heavenly host praising God and saying, Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace, good will to men.
And don’t forget, Santa Claus will be arriving in just a few moments. The first ten boys and girls will receive a special gift from Santa and . . .
. . . they came with haste, and found Mary and Joseph, and the babe lying in a manger.
We hope you’ve found everything on your list, to make this a joyful Christmas. Please come again, and . . .
. . . the shepherds returned, glorifying and praising God for all the things that they had heard and seen.
Copyright © 1983 James N. Watkins
* Fun fact: Kmart was owned by Sears, but both went out of business recently. Kmart was famous for its instant sales “at the flashing blue light.”
For more hope and ho! ho! ho! visit The 12 Sites of Christmas
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