May 15, 2016

Hi, I’m Jim, and welcome to more encouragement and entertainment than you can shake a memory stick at! The theme for this week is, of course, Mothers!

You can also access more than 300 posts on death, faith, health, heavy topics, holidays, hope, humor, life hacks, love, parents, sex, spiritual issues and writing resources.

Enjoy some hope and humor,
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MotherAndBabyhealthyblackwoman

‘Faith of Our Mothers’ updated

If your church is tired of replacing “Father” with “Mother” for “Faith of Our Mothers” on Mom’s special day, here are some new lyrics for the old, old song:

      Faith of our mothers, living yet,
      after church meetings, house-breaking pets,
      Car-pooling Little League, lessons at 2,
      None would get done if it weren’t for you.
      Faith of our mothers! Holy faith!
      We will be true to you always.

      Faith of our mothers, living still,
      in spite of doc’tring others while ill,
      Working long hours and dinner at 5,
      Only by God’s grace are they alive!
      Faith of our mothers! Holy faith!
      We will be true to you always.

      Faith of our mothers passed on to each
      child and grandchild, nephew and niece,
      Sharing their faith, their hope, and their love,
      Grant them your strength and peace from above.
      Faith of our mothers! Holy faith!
      We will be true to you always.

Copyright © 1993 James N. Watkins


Happy Mother’s Day columns and cartoons

The papoose-driven life
Lessons learned from a four-month-old grandaughter

jimshortsparents

Son of a saint!
When godly parents have not-so-godly children

“Spray paint” parenting
The secret is thin coats of moral and ethical lessons

jimshortsmothersday2

Talking to your kids about S-E-X
Children will learn about sex—from us or the bus!

Talking to children about war, terrorism, school violence . . .
It’s a frightening time to be a child—and a parent

mom

Top ten things my mom taught me
(Yep, that’s my mom above.)

You may be a parent if . . .
. . . you’ve ever uttered one or more of these classic lines

jimshortschildren

Get your daily dose of cartoons on Facebook and on the archives. And follow my race for the White House at Watkins for President 2016.


Quips and quotations on motherhood

A suburban mother’s role is to deliver children obstetrically once, and by car forever after. Peter De Vries

The one thing children wear out faster than shoes is parents. John J. Plomp

Insanity is hereditary. You can get it from your children. Sam Levenson

Being a full-time mother is one of the highest salaried jobs . . . since the payment is pure love. Mildred B. Vermont

All that I am, or hope to be, I owe to my angel mother. Abraham Lincoln

We never know the love of the parent until we become parents ourselves. Henry Ward Beecher

Read more quotations of hope and humor at Why? Over 1,000 Quotations on Life’s Most Difficult Questions.


Top photo from healthyblackwoman.com

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May 1, 2016

Hi, I’m Jim, and welcome to more encouragement and entertainment than you can shake a memory stick at! The theme for this week is graduation.

You can also access more than 300 posts on death, faith, health, heavy topics, holidays, hope, humor, life hacks, love, parents, sex, spiritual issues and writing resources.

Enjoy some hope and humor,
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graduationiwu

Top ten things you won’t hear at commencement

Ever since Pebbles and Bam Bam graduated from Bedrock High, commencement speakers have been telling the field of funny hats to work for world peace, follow its dreams, and always wear clean underwear in case of an accident.

So cue “Pomp and Happenstance,” here are the top ten things I’ve learned since I wore a black bathrobe. [Continue reading]


graduation

I wish you faith

For my daughter, Faith’s, high school graduation, I wrote these lyrics for the junior show choir to sing to the seniors. This is my wish for you if you’re graduating.

I wish you truth for your decisions,
I wish you doubts to make you sure,
I wish you fear to give you caution,
I wish you courage to keep you pure,
But beyond these hopes and wishes,
one prayer soars high above,
I wish for you my graduate
faith and hope and love.

I wish defeats to make you humble,
I wish success to let you soar,
I wish you tears to make you tender,
I wish you joy and so much more.
For beyond these hopes and wishes,
one prayer soars high above,
I wish for you my graduate
faith and hope and love.

So as you stand and face tomorrow,
When life gets rough and tough,
There’s someone who believes in you
with faith and hope and love.

So I wish for you my graduate
faith and hope and love.

Copyright © 1996 James N. Watkins


jimshortsgrades

Cartoon of the week

Here’s one of my favorite cartoons. Remember, no potential employer ever looks at your transcript!

Get your daily dose on Facebook and on the archives. And follow my race for the White House at Watkins for President 2016.


Quips and quotations on your future

Be yourself, because everyone else is already taken. Oscar Wilde

It seems to us that the most important work in the world is the work which is visible, which we can see: building a house, plowing the land, feeding cattle, gathering fruits; and that the work which is invisible, the work done by our soul, is not important. But our invisible work at the improvement of our soul is the most important work in the world, and all other visible kinds of work are useful only when we do this major work. Leo Tolstoy

Jesus came to announce to us that an identity based on success, popularity, and power is a false identity—an illusion! Loudly and clearly he says: “You are not what the world makes you; but you are children of God.” Henri Nouwen

The impact that God has planned for us does not occur when we are pursuing impact. It occurs when we are pursuing God. Phil Vischer

Let all our employment be to know God. Brother Lawrence

Are you trying to make a living, make a difference, or leave a legacy? Seth Godin

If you think you are too small to be effective, you have never been in bed with a mosquito.Betty Reese

Read more quotations of hope and humor at Why? Over 1,000 Quotations on Life’s Most Difficult Questions.


Pics from Indiana Wesleyan University and MorgueFile.

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I have in my right hand, direct from my home office in Corn Borer, Indiana, today’s category: Top ten posts from April 2016

10. Who is the supreme super hero?

9. Encouraging quips and quotations

8. Cartoons

7. Does DNA disprove evolution?

6. Cure for common cold: sex

5. God is never late, but he sure is slow

4. Children who marry their parents: the psychology of courtship

3. What was Paul thinking when he wrote 1 Timothy 2:12?

2. Were U.S. founding fathers Christian?

And, the number one post in April 2016 . . .

1. It Is Well with My Soul: the rest of the stories

(See right column for the latest posts.)

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April 25, 2016

Hi, I’m Jim, and welcome to more encouragement and entertainment than you can shake a memory stick at! This week’s theme is dealing with drama in our lives.

You can also access more than 300 posts on death, faith, health, heavy topics, holidays, hope, humor, life hacks, love, parents, sex, spiritual issues and writing resources.

Enjoy some hope and humor,
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SpeedSandraBullock

God is such a ‘drama king’

In an action/adventure film, the hero never defuses the bomb with one hour to spare. Not even one minute. It’s always less than one second! (And, of course, the agonizing decision as to whether to cut the red or blue wire.)

That’s just good script writing. Ratchet up the conflict to the breaking point, then resolve the imminent, inevitable disaster with just a split second remaining. Or, in the case of Speed, resolve the conflict (hero, heroine and passengers are safely off the bomb-laden bus) and then throw in an entirely new conflict (heroine is now strapped into bomb-laden vest)!

God, the “author and finisher of our faith,” is the ultimate script writer! [Continue reading]

Related post
God is such a “drama king” The sequel (God uses classic fiction formulas in our lives)


handgrenadehangnail

Is it a hangnail or hand grenade?

It’s sometimes helpful to put drama into perspective. Is this truly a hand grenade or is it more in the category of a hangnail?

For instance, ask yourself, would I trade this problem in on a hangnail? How ’bout a headache? Harmonica concert? Hernia? Hair loss? Holdup? Hurricane? Hand grenade?

In the grand scheme of life, most “problems” are somewhere between harmonica concert and hernia. But I would have traded some hand grenade shrapnel for the restoration of a broken relationship or miraculous resurrection of a loved one. [Read Is it a hangnail or a hand grenade? from my book, Squeezing Good Out of Bad.]

More related posts
Are you listening to Goliath or God?
“Don’t be afraid”
Feeling inadequate, ill-equipped, in the dark?
Hope in a hand basket
I’m a giant killer! [Print and audio]


jimshortsanecdotes

Cartoon on drama

The life of a writer is filled with drama! Here’s some Hope and humor for writers.

Get your daily dose on Facebook and on the archives. And follow my race for the White House at Watkins for President 2016.


Quips and quotations on a life of drama

Some days you’re the pigeon; some days you’re the statue. Roger Anderson

Every day begins with an act of courage and hope: getting out of bed. Mason Cooley

Hope knows that if great trials are avoided great deeds remain undone and the possibility of growth into greatness of soul is aborted. Brennan Manning

Are you in the midst of a situation where, as you pray, you find yourself putting the problem first? If so, you’re starting where you should end. You’re rehearsing the problem, making it seem larger than it is, when what you need to do is rehearse God’s greatness and bigness. Then the problem shrinks to its right portions. Mark Buchanan

And nothing but our trials and perils would ever have led some of us to know Him as we do, to trust Him as we have, and to draw from Him the measures of grace which our very extremities made indispensable. Difficulties and obstacles are God’s challenges to faith. When hindrances confront us in the path of duty, we are to recognize them as vessels for faith to fill with the fullness and all-sufficiency of Jesus; and as we go forward, simply and fully trusting Him, we may be tested, we may have to wait and let patience have her perfect work; but we shall surely find at last the stone rolled away, and the Lord waiting to render unto us double for our time of testing. A. B. Simpson

Read more quotations of hope and humor at Why? Over 1,000 Quotations on Life’s Most Difficult Questions.


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April 17, 2016

Hi, I’m Jim, and welcome to more encouragement and entertainment than you can shake a memory stick at! This week’s theme is defeating despair.

You can also access more than 300 posts on death, faith, health, heavy topics, holidays, hope, humor, life hacks, love, parents, sex, spiritual issues and writing resources.

Enjoy some hope and humor,
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PugentSound

Riding the tides of life

The desert and the parched land will be glad . . . they will see the glory of the Lord, the splendor of our God (Isaiah 35:1a, 2e).

Surrounded by lush ferns, towering cedar pines, and majestic mountains, the tidal basin of Washington’s Puget Sound lies flat and lifeless. Only dead branches, rotting logs, and old tires emerge from this salt-dried waste land of brownish gray.

But hours later, the silver-plated sea spreads out across the barren land covering it with the sunset’s burgundy, mauve, and dark pink colors.

Two times each day, 365 days a year, a “dry and thirsty land where there is no water” is transformed into sea of glorious colors.

Perhaps we, as God’s creations, also experience the ebb and flow of emotional and spiritual tides. We climb lush mountain sides and descend into valleys gray with death. We taste the freshness of living water and the dry, salty taste of dust.

Maybe it is the harsh ebb and flow of life and death that hone our sensitivity to our world and our God—life and death, pleasure and pain, joy and sorrow, and the glory of God and the despair of this world.

Through it all, the unchanging rhythm of the tide gives us hope that refreshment always follows dryness. And, above it all, shines the glory of God.

Copyright © James N. Watkins All rights reserved.


willwriteforfood2014

A not-so-glamorous day in life of an author/speaker

Today I don’t have any articles or books to write. No international—or even local Optimist Club—speaking engagements.

I forced myself to at least get out of bed at 6:15 am after listening to heart-breaking news on the clock radio. So, I’m up, I’m dressed (if you consider gyms shorts and T-shirt “dressed”), but no reason to take a shower as a noon meeting was cancelled.

I’m dutifully sitting at my computer in my office answering email, but mostly mindlessly surfing the ‘net for something to stimulate a Hope & Humor post. (I think I’m simply overwhelmed at all the ways it seems culture is coming apart at the seams, so don’t feel very hopeful or humorous right now.)

I’m trying to convince myself that this is all part of the mental illness of being a writer. For every day of exhilarating writing, there’s a day of immobilizing boredom. For every exciting speaking engagement, a day where I just mutter to myself. [Continue reading]


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Cartoon of the week

Here’s one of my favorite cartoons on overcoming depression.

Get your daily dose on Facebook and on the archives. And follow my race for the White House at Watkins for President 2016.


Quips and quotations

The Christian life is not a constant high. I have my moments of deep discouragement. I have to go to God in prayer with tears in my eyes, and say, “O God, forgive me,” or “Help me.” Billy Graham

[God] inhabits our despair as well as our praises. Henri Nouwen

God in His eternal music, plays upon the black keys as lovingly as He plays upon the white. Elton Trueblood

My child, do not trust in your present feeling, for it will soon give way to another. As long as you live you will be subject to changeableness in spite of yourself. You will become merry at one time and sad at another, now peaceful but again disturbed, at one moment devout and the next in devout, sometimes diligent while at other times lazy, now grave and again flippant.

But the man who is wise and whose spirit is well instructed stands superior to these changes. He pays no attention to what he feels in himself or from what quarter the wind of fickleness blows, so long as the whole intention of his mind is conducive to his proper and desired end. For thus he can stand undivided, unchanged, and unshaken, with the singleness of his intention directed unwaveringly toward Me, even in the midst of so many changing events. And the purer this singleness of intention is, with so much the more constancy does he pass through many storms. Thomas à Kempis

Read more quotations of hope and humor at Why? Over 1,000 Quotations on Life’s Most Difficult Questions.


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April 10, 2016

Hi, I’m Jim, and welcome to more encouragement and entertainment than you can shake a memory stick at! This week, we look at perverted prayers.

You can also access more than 300 posts on death, faith, health, heavy topics, holidays, hope, humor, life hacks, love, parenting, sex, spiritual issues and writing resources.

Enjoy some hope and humor,
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mcdonaldsdrivethru

Drive-through prayers

Sometimes I’m afraid I treat God like the drive-through window at McDonalds. I scan the menu board of “promise verses,” place my order, and then race my engine as I wait impatiently.

One week in 1988, I decided that I would try to get beyond my “McGod” mentality of prayer and just praise the Lord—without placing one “order.” I picked the wrong week!

Monday, I discovered we had a little over one hundred dollars in our check book and bills of over a thousand dollars. Wednesday a publisher, who owed me several hundred dollars in back royalties, announced that it too was broke. I was tempted to shout my order into menu board speaker, but I managed to simply praise God that week.

Friday, while on my way to the bank for a loan to cover our bills, I stopped by my daughter’s school to pay her tuition. There had been an error last semester and we didn’t owe money that month. Praise the Lord!

My next stop was at a Christian university to check on some advertising copy I had recently written. “That was great,” the director announced. “We’d also like you to rewrite all our admissions brochures. Do you think you could do that for around a thousand dollars.” Praise the Lord!

I never did get to the bank. All our bills were paid! God does inhabit the praises of His people (Psalm 22:3).

Copyright © 2005 James N. Watkins

Related posts
Fifty praises between bed and bathroom
God is never late—but he sure is slow


PrayerChainWide

Why I’m not forwarding this prayer

Who creates these memes?! (Oops, I’ve already broken the spell by asking a question! Rats!)

No, this prayer is not “so powerful!” God is powerful! And he’s not obligated to bless you if you send this to 12 other people! God doesn’t operate a multi-level blessing scheme!

No, God is not going to determine if he’s “first in your life” by whether or not you forward this prayer! He wants to know you are loving him and loving your neighbor. (I don’t think God even has a Facebook account to check in on his creations.) [Continue reading my rant]

Related post
Is prayer in public school really a good idea?!


jimshortsshakehead2

Cartoon of the week

Here’s my favorite cartoon on prayer.

Get your daily dose on Facebook and on the archives. And follow my race for the White House at Watkins for President 2016.


Quips and quotations on prayer

The only time my prayers are never answered is on the golf course. Billy Graham

No prayer is lost. Praying breath was never spent in vain. There is no such thing as prayer unanswered or unnoticed by God, and some things that we count refusals or denials are simply delays. Horatius Bonar

God always answers prayer: sometimes He says yes, sometimes He says no, and sometimes He says, “You’ve got to be kidding.” Fran Fernandez

God always answers prayer: no, slow, go. JNW

Christ sometimes delays His help that He may try our faith and quicken our prayers. The boat may be covered with the waves, and He sleeps on; but He will wake up before it sinks. He sleeps, but He never oversleeps; and there are no “too lates” with Him. Alexander Maclaren

Read more quotations of hope and humor at Why? Over 1,000 Quotations on Life’s Most Difficult Questions.


website1997B
Happy anniversary to me!

Since April 12, 1997—19 years, which is 19,000 in Internet years—it’s been a honor to welcome over 7 million guests from 120 countries with articles, book excerpts, cartoons, humor columns and videos. (Click for the original site.)

Most of all, thank you for stopping by. Please tell a friend about jameswatkins.com and come back weekly for more hope and humor!


If you enjoyed this week’s issue, please share on your social networks. Thanks!

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dictionary

Defining words, defining morality

“Pro-choice” advocates are apparently afraid of even the word “pro-life.” Visit the Chrome Web Store and you’ll find an extension for “Choice Language” that assures that those supporting abortion on demand will never see pro-life on the popular Internet browser. Yep, the program automatically replaces pro-life with “anti-choice” on the screen!

It’s sponsored by the National Institute for Reproductive Health Action Fund which argues, “Those who stand against a woman’s right to decide what is best for her own body prop themselves up as righteous saviors using a problematic framework of rhetoric and religion.”

This makes a strong case for the power and perversion of words. [Continue reading Defining words, defining morality.]

The Watkins New World Church Dictionary

The church is also guilty of using “weasel words” in its virtuous vocabulary. Here some of my favorite entries that you’ll probably hear in the foyer.


willwriteforfood2014

Communicating with cross words

Christians are often guilty of writing in “church-ese.” A secular reader won’t have a clue if you use words like atonement, carnal nature, conviction, justification, grace, repentance or salvation. Here are some practical ways your can cross-over in writing for the world. (See, even I forget and use words like “world”!)


thewhyfileslong

Breaking habits before they break you

A woman posted on my facebook page that she was “struggling with a reoccurring sin.” I just put this chapter excerpt online for her and anyone else . [Click if you’re struggling with temptation]


jimshortsaprilsfoolsday

Cartoon of the week

Here’s my favorite cartoon of the past week. And some advice on finding truth on the Internet from the disciple Luke.

Get your daily dose on Facebook and on the archives. And follow my race for the White House at Watkins for President 2016.


Quips and quotations

Living a life of faith means never knowing where you are being led. But it does mean loving and knowing the One who is leading. It is literally a life of faith, not of understanding and reason—a life of knowing Him who calls us to go. Faith is rooted in the knowledge of a Person, and one of the biggest traps we fall into is the belief that if we have faith, God will surely lead us to success in the world. The final stage in the life of faith is the attainment of character.

A life of faith is not a life of one glorious mountaintop experience after another, like soaring on eagles’ wings, but is a life of day-in and day-out consistency; a life of walking without fainting (see Isaiah 40:31). It is not even a question of the holiness of sanctification, but of something which comes much farther down the road. It is a faith that has been tried and proved and has withstood the test.

Not “success”! Not being extraordinary! Oswald Chambers

Many difficulties and perplexities in connection with our Christian lives might best be settled by a simple and bold decision of our will to go forward with the light we have, leaving the speculations and theories that we cannot decide for further settlement. What we need is to act, and to act with the best light we have. As we step out into the present duty and full obedience, many things will be made plain which it is no use waiting to decide.

Launch out into the deep with a bold plunge, and Christ will settle for you all the questions that you are now debating. More probably, He will show you their insignificance and let you see that the only way to settle them is to leap over them. They are Satan’s petty snares to waste your time and keep you halting when you should be marching on.A. B. Simpson

Read more quotations of hope and humor from my book Why? Over 1,000 Quotations on Life’s Most Difficult Questions.


Hundreds of posts with hope and humor

Click for more content than you can shake a memory stick at! Posts on death, faith, health, heavy topics, holidays, hope, humor, life hacks, love, parents, sex, spiritual issues and writing resources.

If you enjoyed this issue of Hope & Humor, please share it on your social networks. Thanks!

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DonaldTrumpBible

I have in my right hand, direct from my home office in Corn Borer, Indiana, today’s category: Top ten posts from March 2016

10. Who is the supreme super hero?

9. What must I do to inherit eternal life?

8. Does DNA disprove evolution?

7. God is never late, but he sure is slow

6. Children who marry their parents: the psychology of courtship

5. Cure for common cold: sex

4. What was Paul thinking when he wrote 1 Timothy 2:12?

4. Ten Bible verses Donald Trump must have missed

2. Were U.S. founding fathers Christian?

And, the number one post in February 2016 . . .

1. It Is Well with My Soul: the rest of the stories

(See right column for the latest posts.)

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GardenTombLarge3

He is risen! He is here!

A local church announced on their sign, “HE IS RISEN! HE IS NOT HERE.” They may want to reconsider that message. Christ is risen, indeed, but he also living within those who have believed on his name! Click for my favorite Easter columns, quotation and cartoons. And do have a wonderful Easter celebrating that he is risen. He is here!
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BelgiumNYDailyNews

It’s Sunday, but Jesus is comin’!

Author Tony Campolo’s most famous message declares, “It’s Friday, but Sunday’s Comin’.” Jesus has been unjustly charged and condemned to die. It’s Friday, but Sunday’s comin’. The religious and political tyrants have stopped His rebellious message. It’s Friday, but Sunday’s comin’. He has been brutally beaten, stripped, and nailed to a cross. It’s Friday, but Sunday’s comin’. Christ is sealed in a tomb, his dead body guarded by Roman soldiers. It’s Friday, but Sunday’s comin’. The message builds to a powerful conclusion when the pastor simply shouts, “It’s Friday!” and the congregation responds, “But Sunday’s comin’.

But it’s Easter Sunday. . . and throughout the world, people are suffering from Tuesday’s deadly terrorist attacks, crime and violence, life-threatening diseases like Zika, effects of abuse and divorce, unemployment or “under employment,” depression, and grief from a the loss of a loved one. “It’s Friday, but Sunday’s comin'” is not always comforting. But that’s only half of the story of Christ. Read one of my favorite posts, It’s Sunday, but Jesus is comin’!


jimshortspurereligion

Cartoon of the week

Here’s my favorite cartoon of the past week. The difference between Islam and Christianity is the New Testament: Are Islam and Christianity peaceful religions?.

Get your daily dose on Facebook and on the archives. And follow my race for the White House at Watkins for President 2016.


Things my grandkids say . . .

While watching our granddaughters last week, they decided to play therapist:

Eight-year-old: “Express your feelings.”

Ten-year-old: “I’m mad and sad. My brother hit me in the face, but Mom blamed me.”

Eight-year-old: “I have some deep thoughts for you. Take notes. I also have some pills for you. Just take these.”

Ten-year-old: “I feel worse after talking with you. I want to punch you.”

Eight-year-old: “I have my own issues. I don’t know why I’m a counselor. So, here’s a certificate for being a good patient!”

(I’m sure they didn’t get this from their mom! She’s an amazing therapist.)


Quips and quotations on aging

A great benefit of getting older is that you learn to stop looking for other people’s approval. Katrina Mayer

Aging is not lost youth but a new stage of opportunity and strength. Betty Friedan

The older you get the more important it is to not act your age. GrowingBolder.com

Wrinkles should merely indicate where smiles have been. Mark Twain

Don’t count the days, make the days count. Muhammad Ali

Aging is not a disease that needs to be cured. It’s an opportunity that needs to be seized. Marc Middleton

Keeping my chin up was easier when I had just one! Me, from Over the Hill Onto the Mountain Top

Plus, Easter quips and quotations. And read more quotations of hope and humor from my book Why? Over 1,000 Quotations on Life’s Most Difficult Questions.


Hundreds of posts with hope and humor

Click for more content than you can shake a memory stick at! Posts on death, faith, health, heavy topics, holidays, hope, humor, life hacks, love, parents, sex, spiritual issues and writing resources.

If you enjoyed this issue of Hope&Humor Magazine hopeful, humorous or helpful, please share it on your social networks. Thanks!

Cover pic from Israeli Department of Tourism.

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candleebs5

Shock. Disbelief. Horror. Anger. Grief. These are just a few of the emotions overwhelming family, friends—and entire world—following this morning’s bombings in Brussels Belgium. Here are some resources I hope will be helpful in responding to this tragedy:

Reacting
Dealing with death and grief
“bin Laden, kiss my pass!” (September 10, 2003)
Talking to your children about terrorism

Reasoning
Hope amid horror (September 11, 2006)
What motivates terrorists?
Taking the terror out of terrorism

Responding
Can war on terrorism be won? (September 11, 2005)
How can we overcome evil with good?
We are strong! We will survive! (September 17, 2001)
What we haven’t learned from 9/11 (September 9, 2002)
Candle-lighting ceremony following terrorist attacks (September 11, 2001)

My thoughts and prayers are with all those affected by this latest terrorist attack.
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Copyright © James N. Watkins

Photo by MorgueFile.com

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